"Grandpa, can zap ya like a zombie?"
I watched from my book and looked at my niece's eight years with interest.
"I'm not quite sure Pete. I think you have to go, the one with me. I can do some research and get back to you?"
"Okay," he said and crossed the garden.
Well, I have always had a zombie, but met with the approach of Halloween, I thought it would be wise to be prepared. And if you think, I noticed some strangelooking for people in our country recently, his eyes wild and staring with a dazed, glassy. But then I learned that the local bar had to sell some of the new, powerful, Real Ale, which has sold in a few days.
Anyway, I went to bed, night spirits, ghosts and thought ........ Zombies.
"Hmmm" I thought and I saw my wife is getting ready to sleep, "maybe I should seriously zombie in a defensive system."
So the next morning before I leftcomputer and began my search for some information expert. I must say that I did not take him long to put together some interesting facts and figures. And I soon discovered that the zombies seem to see quite easily turned off. No problem.
But like any hobby, you soon discover they have the right equiptment. It 's always the same. Li interested in a topic, say the arrangement of flowers or collecting exotic shells, and then discover that you spend a bit 'Fortunate to have all the right gear, so do not look like a novice. This principle applies to the eradication Zombie.
Now please understand.
Before continuing, I must say that the readers of sensitive disposition might want to stop reading, what follows will not get a bit 'cruel and Gorey.
No, not me? Well, you've been warned!
First things first then. What tools and gadgets we need for our zombie zapping?
Ok, here is theBasic list. (I try to keep costs to a minimum here for a limited budget)
1. Sledge Hammer ....... a good location. Not one of their cheap imports. You do not want to drop the hammer head at a critical moment.
2. Shotgun ....... nothing too expensive (do not use your Purdy). The basic element should do it.
3. Large-caliber gun ....... How about a 44 Magnum? ("Make My Day, zombie friend!")
4. Chainsaw ....... To see if you borrow neighbors. You do not havedo your own destruction.
5 mower ....... Just-in-law. You'll understand.
6 cars ....... You must use the wife or girlfriend. You can 't go too well anyway so that will be missed.
7 petrol ....... a couple of gallons should do it.
8 helicopter ....... This difficult. Do you know a local millionaire? Tell him you need it for a charity event or something.
Okay, now for the meatier "stuff like" (squeemies. were ..warned!)
The first task is to render inoperable brain. This is your weapon came as a weapon will be useful or very heavy (not yourself in the foot). Now a shot from one of these children should be allowed to see the sky through the face Zomb. Or, if you work, you can only swing that bat and the earth a skull crusher. Take your best shirt though.
Now your next task is to cut off the head. Do not panic. Imagine having theSunday roast in the oven ready to go. But you Zomb Using the chainsaw or neighbors, if you are a true showman lift the poor so the rotor blades of the rich is the work done. A whistle and everything is finished.
If you are an avid outdoors type, the site will be what you like the next bit. This is were some serious Burnin '. Also imagine that you're gone for the weekend in the woods and you need to go to a good fire. Zomb lay on a pile of dry sticks or logs,Sprinkle generously with gasoline. Then step back and light the blue touch paper. Hmmmm ....... just the feeling that the natural heat!
Hey, we're almost done.
The final touch is really a lot to do with destruction of evidence as possible. We do not want the rest of the Zomb I just know where some of his friends after you arrive and decide to pursue. We have the choice.
We are able to grind or mix of use for what remains of Zomba. The law ismower may be useful here. It will chop and distribute all in one action. Or could your head in a blender or food jump to wife / girlfriend to borrow the car and a bit 'of maneuver on the spot. You need to be creative here people. Just enjoy!
Well, that's all. Easy.
Now I hope this article will be useful for those who have the stomach to read it and have a good sense of humor. My nephew, of course, never mentioned the "zombie movie" themeagain. He had already found a healthy interest in dealing with his young mind.
But let me tell you that I do not consider my time wasted on this research. No sir! Because on the road, I think I have a cure for the growth of thick hair all over his body I can every full moon, and it really seems to help aching joints found.
My wife is so happy. It sounds like a Howlin 'success. Maybe I should be patented to boot and an advertising campaign.
Do you have a terrible Halloween.
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